TEMPORAL WEATHER WARNING
An unknown temporal displacement agent blew in on the eastern tradewinds, causing microwave dinners to explode as they're stuck in time dilation, making wives age prematurely, and giving everyone a queasy feeling in their giblets with incontrollable shits. Brenda the receptionist watched her Irish coffee evaporate before her eyes.
🥊 VIOLENCE BREAKDOWN
BLESSED
09-11-25
APPROVED
Baiten Switch
Strength40
Speed75
Endurance75
Technique110
Molecular Density5.8
Existential Dread85
Fingers0
Toes25
TALE OF THE TAPE
Baiten Switch VS Average Joe
Average Joe
75Strength
75Speed
75Endurance
75Technique
50.0Molecular Density
45Existential Dread
10Fingers
10Toes
🏆 VIOLENCE VICTOR
Average Joe
Violence concluded.
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