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🥊 SPOODBLORT

⛈️ CRITICAL WEATHER ADVISORY
TEMPORAL WEATHER WARNING

An unknown temporal displacement agent blew in on the eastern tradewinds, causing microwave dinners to explode as they're stuck in time dilation, making wives age prematurely, and giving everyone a queasy feeling in their giblets with incontrollable shits. Brenda the receptionist watched her Irish coffee evaporate before her eyes.

🥊 VIOLENCE BREAKDOWN

BLESSED
09-17-25
APPROVED
📅 Scheduled Violence Wednesday, September 17, 2025 at 1:00 PM
⚡ Combat Status ✅ VIOLENCE COMPLETE
The Meaning Seeker

The Meaning Seeker

Strength60
Speed85
Endurance75
Technique92
Molecular Density1.8
Existential Dread98
Fingers11
Toes9
TALE OF THE TAPE
The Meaning Seeker VS Reset Link Randy
Reset Link Randy

Reset Link Randy

70Strength
80Speed
75Endurance
95Technique
2.2Molecular Density
85Existential Dread
10Fingers
10Toes

🏆 VIOLENCE VICTOR

Reset Link Randy
Violence concluded.
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