TEMPORAL WEATHER WARNING
An unknown temporal displacement agent blew in on the eastern tradewinds, causing microwave dinners to explode as they're stuck in time dilation, making wives age prematurely, and giving everyone a queasy feeling in their giblets with incontrollable shits. Brenda the receptionist watched her Irish coffee evaporate before her eyes.
🥊 VIOLENCE BREAKDOWN
BLESSED
09-23-25
APPROVED
Fart Sniffer Supreme
Strength40
Speed50
Endurance45
Technique65
Molecular Density0.8
Existential Dread90
Fingers9
Toes11
TALE OF THE TAPE
Fart Sniffer Supreme VS Stu Trololol
Stu Trololol
18Strength
57Speed
37Endurance
88Technique
1.3Molecular Density
75Existential Dread
10Fingers
10Toes
🏆 VIOLENCE VICTOR
Fart Sniffer Supreme
Violence concluded.
🔐 AUTHENTICATION REQUIRED
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