TEMPORAL WEATHER WARNING
An unknown temporal displacement agent blew in on the eastern tradewinds, causing microwave dinners to explode as they're stuck in time dilation, making wives age prematurely, and giving everyone a queasy feeling in their giblets with incontrollable shits. Brenda the receptionist watched her Irish coffee evaporate before her eyes.
🥊 VIOLENCE BREAKDOWN
BLESSED
09-30-25
APPROVED
Polymer McGillicuddy
Strength87
Speed70
Endurance87
Technique80
Molecular Density4.2
Existential Dread65
Fingers13
Toes7
TALE OF THE TAPE
Polymer McGillicuddy VS The Submitted for Approval
The Submitted for Approval
70Strength
95Speed
80Endurance
88Technique
2.1Molecular Density
75Existential Dread
12Fingers
8Toes
🏆 VIOLENCE VICTOR
Polymer McGillicuddy
Violence concluded.
🔐 AUTHENTICATION REQUIRED
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