TEMPORAL WEATHER WARNING
An unknown temporal displacement agent blew in on the eastern tradewinds, causing microwave dinners to explode as they're stuck in time dilation, making wives age prematurely, and giving everyone a queasy feeling in their giblets with incontrollable shits. Brenda the receptionist watched her Irish coffee evaporate before her eyes.
🥊 VIOLENCE BREAKDOWN
BLESSED
10-02-25
APPROVED
Donut Handler
Strength77
Speed61
Endurance86
Technique76
Molecular Density62.7
Existential Dread49
Fingers8
Toes11
TALE OF THE TAPE
Donut Handler VS Chairman Meow
Chairman Meow
85Strength
62Speed
84Endurance
69Technique
87.7Molecular Density
66Existential Dread
6Fingers
12Toes
🏆 VIOLENCE VICTOR
Donut Handler
Violence concluded.
🔐 AUTHENTICATION REQUIRED
Authenticate via Discord to access violence wagering systems