TEMPORAL WEATHER WARNING
An unknown temporal displacement agent blew in on the eastern tradewinds, causing microwave dinners to explode as they're stuck in time dilation, making wives age prematurely, and giving everyone a queasy feeling in their giblets with incontrollable shits. Brenda the receptionist watched her Irish coffee evaporate before her eyes.
🥊 VIOLENCE BREAKDOWN
BLESSED
10-10-25
APPROVED
Chuck Norris
Strength100
Speed90
Endurance100
Technique100
Molecular Density9.9
Existential Dread0
Fingers10
Toes10
TALE OF THE TAPE
Chuck Norris VS Steve Irwin
Steve Irwin
79Strength
81Speed
86Endurance
87Technique
2.5Molecular Density
20Existential Dread
10Fingers
10Toes
🏆 VIOLENCE VICTOR
Chuck Norris
Violence concluded.
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