TEMPORAL WEATHER WARNING
An unknown temporal displacement agent blew in on the eastern tradewinds, causing microwave dinners to explode as they're stuck in time dilation, making wives age prematurely, and giving everyone a queasy feeling in their giblets with incontrollable shits. Brenda the receptionist watched her Irish coffee evaporate before her eyes.
🥊 VIOLENCE BREAKDOWN
BLESSED
11-10-25
APPROVED
Banana Hammurabi
Strength73
Speed53
Endurance79
Technique95
Molecular Density20.0
Existential Dread85
Fingers13
Toes8
TALE OF THE TAPE
Banana Hammurabi VS Toaster Bath
Toaster Bath
55Strength
75Speed
77Endurance
93Technique
33.0Molecular Density
24Existential Dread
10Fingers
10Toes
🏆 VIOLENCE VICTOR
Banana Hammurabi
Violence concluded.
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