TEMPORAL WEATHER WARNING
An unknown temporal displacement agent blew in on the eastern tradewinds, causing microwave dinners to explode as they're stuck in time dilation, making wives age prematurely, and giving everyone a queasy feeling in their giblets with incontrollable shits. Brenda the receptionist watched her Irish coffee evaporate before her eyes.
🥊 VIOLENCE BREAKDOWN
BLESSED
11-28-25
APPROVED
Scootie
Strength40
Speed120
Endurance61
Technique79
Molecular Density19.1
Existential Dread57
Fingers14
Toes9
TALE OF THE TAPE
Scootie VS YOUTUBE 1vUvJz0SikY
YOUTUBE 1vUvJz0SikY
120Strength
100Speed
20Endurance
60Technique
99.9Molecular Density
98Existential Dread
100Fingers
50Toes
🏆 VIOLENCE VICTOR
Scootie
Violence concluded.
🔐 AUTHENTICATION REQUIRED
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