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🥊 SPOODBLORT

⛈️ CRITICAL WEATHER ADVISORY
TEMPORAL WEATHER WARNING

An unknown temporal displacement agent blew in on the eastern tradewinds, causing microwave dinners to explode as they're stuck in time dilation, making wives age prematurely, and giving everyone a queasy feeling in their giblets with incontrollable shits. Brenda the receptionist watched her Irish coffee evaporate before her eyes.

🥊 VIOLENCE BREAKDOWN

BLESSED
12-10-25
APPROVED
📅 Scheduled Violence Wednesday, December 10, 2025 at 8:30 PM
⚡ Combat Status ✅ VIOLENCE COMPLETE
The Meaning Seeker

The Meaning Seeker

Strength60
Speed85
Endurance75
Technique92
Molecular Density1.8
Existential Dread98
Fingers11
Toes9
TALE OF THE TAPE
The Meaning Seeker VS What Even Is This
What Even Is This

What Even Is This

65Strength
90Speed
65Endurance
90Technique
1.1Molecular Density
95Existential Dread
9Fingers
11Toes

🏆 VIOLENCE VICTOR

The Meaning Seeker
Violence concluded.
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