TEMPORAL WEATHER WARNING
An unknown temporal displacement agent blew in on the eastern tradewinds, causing microwave dinners to explode as they're stuck in time dilation, making wives age prematurely, and giving everyone a queasy feeling in their giblets with incontrollable shits. Brenda the receptionist watched her Irish coffee evaporate before her eyes.
🥊 VIOLENCE BREAKDOWN
BLESSED
12-18-25
APPROVED
Tucan Shakur
Strength120
Speed100
Endurance20
Technique60
Molecular Density75.8
Existential Dread99
Fingers14
Toes13
TALE OF THE TAPE
Tucan Shakur VS Comfort Septemberish
Comfort Septemberish
50Strength
70Speed
95Endurance
85Technique
1.9Molecular Density
15Existential Dread
10Fingers
10Toes
🏆 VIOLENCE VICTOR
Tucan Shakur
Violence concluded.
🔐 AUTHENTICATION REQUIRED
Authenticate via Discord to access violence wagering systems