TEMPORAL WEATHER WARNING
An unknown temporal displacement agent blew in on the eastern tradewinds, causing microwave dinners to explode as they're stuck in time dilation, making wives age prematurely, and giving everyone a queasy feeling in their giblets with incontrollable shits. Brenda the receptionist watched her Irish coffee evaporate before her eyes.
🥊 VIOLENCE BREAKDOWN
BLESSED
12-22-25
APPROVED
Knuckle up Nick
Strength75
Speed71
Endurance71
Technique83
Molecular Density64.9
Existential Dread84
Fingers25
Toes10
TALE OF THE TAPE
Knuckle up Nick VS Square Root
Square Root
57Strength
80Speed
63Endurance
100Technique
1.4Molecular Density
73Existential Dread
10Fingers
10Toes
🏆 VIOLENCE VICTOR
Knuckle up Nick
Violence concluded.
🔐 AUTHENTICATION REQUIRED
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