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🥊 SPOODBLORT

⛈️ CRITICAL WEATHER ADVISORY
TEMPORAL WEATHER WARNING

An unknown temporal displacement agent blew in on the eastern tradewinds, causing microwave dinners to explode as they're stuck in time dilation, making wives age prematurely, and giving everyone a queasy feeling in their giblets with incontrollable shits. Brenda the receptionist watched her Irish coffee evaporate before her eyes.

🥊 VIOLENCE BREAKDOWN

BLESSED
12-23-25
APPROVED
📅 Scheduled Violence Tuesday, December 23, 2025 at 9:00 PM
⚡ Combat Status ✅ VIOLENCE COMPLETE
Copay Carl

Copay Carl

Strength75
Speed80
Endurance75
Technique88
Molecular Density2.3
Existential Dread90
Fingers10
Toes10
TALE OF THE TAPE
Copay Carl VS Rinse Jackson
Rinse Jackson

Rinse Jackson

95Strength
55Speed
95Endurance
75Technique
3.8Molecular Density
10Existential Dread
10Fingers
10Toes

🏆 VIOLENCE VICTOR

Copay Carl
Violence concluded.
← Return to Violence Schedule