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🥊 SPOODBLORT

⛈️ CRITICAL WEATHER ADVISORY
TEMPORAL WEATHER WARNING

An unknown temporal displacement agent blew in on the eastern tradewinds, causing microwave dinners to explode as they're stuck in time dilation, making wives age prematurely, and giving everyone a queasy feeling in their giblets with incontrollable shits. Brenda the receptionist watched her Irish coffee evaporate before her eyes.

🥊 VIOLENCE BREAKDOWN

BLESSED
12-27-25
APPROVED
📅 Scheduled Violence Saturday, December 27, 2025 at 9:30 PM
⚡ Combat Status ✅ VIOLENCE COMPLETE
Toilet Bowl Stain Steve

Toilet Bowl Stain Steve

Strength79
Speed67
Endurance75
Technique79
Molecular Density3.1
Existential Dread48
Fingers10
Toes10
TALE OF THE TAPE
Toilet Bowl Stain Steve VS Nylon Dreams
Nylon Dreams

Nylon Dreams

70Strength
95Speed
75Endurance
85Technique
1.8Molecular Density
55Existential Dread
10Fingers
10Toes

🏆 VIOLENCE VICTOR

Nylon Dreams
Violence concluded.
← Return to Violence Schedule