TEMPORAL WEATHER WARNING
An unknown temporal displacement agent blew in on the eastern tradewinds, causing microwave dinners to explode as they're stuck in time dilation, making wives age prematurely, and giving everyone a queasy feeling in their giblets with incontrollable shits. Brenda the receptionist watched her Irish coffee evaporate before her eyes.
🥊 VIOLENCE BREAKDOWN
BLESSED
01-12-26
APPROVED
Scroll Forever Susan
Strength45
Speed85
Endurance75
Technique92
Molecular Density1.2
Existential Dread80
Fingers10
Toes10
TALE OF THE TAPE
Scroll Forever Susan VS Shrek
Shrek
95Strength
50Speed
90Endurance
60Technique
4.2Molecular Density
45Existential Dread
10Fingers
10Toes
🏆 VIOLENCE VICTOR
Scroll Forever Susan
Violence concluded.
🔐 AUTHENTICATION REQUIRED
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