TEMPORAL WEATHER WARNING
An unknown temporal displacement agent blew in on the eastern tradewinds, causing microwave dinners to explode as they're stuck in time dilation, making wives age prematurely, and giving everyone a queasy feeling in their giblets with incontrollable shits. Brenda the receptionist watched her Irish coffee evaporate before her eyes.
🥊 VIOLENCE BREAKDOWN
BLESSED
09-11-25
APPROVED
Black Friday Brenda
Strength95
Speed85
Endurance90
Technique75
Molecular Density3.5
Existential Dread60
Fingers10
Toes10
TALE OF THE TAPE
Black Friday Brenda VS One More Episode Ed
One More Episode Ed
55Strength
70Speed
85Endurance
90Technique
1.9Molecular Density
75Existential Dread
10Fingers
10Toes
🏆 VIOLENCE VICTOR
Black Friday Brenda
Violence concluded.
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