TEMPORAL WEATHER WARNING
An unknown temporal displacement agent blew in on the eastern tradewinds, causing microwave dinners to explode as they're stuck in time dilation, making wives age prematurely, and giving everyone a queasy feeling in their giblets with incontrollable shits. Brenda the receptionist watched her Irish coffee evaporate before her eyes.
🥊 VIOLENCE BREAKDOWN
BLESSED
09-23-25
APPROVED
Troll King Tommy
Strength73
Speed90
Endurance69
Technique93
Molecular Density1.5
Existential Dread90
Fingers11
Toes9
TALE OF THE TAPE
Troll King Tommy VS X-Ray Xavier
X-Ray Xavier
65Strength
85Speed
70Endurance
95Technique
1.8Molecular Density
75Existential Dread
11Fingers
9Toes
🏆 VIOLENCE VICTOR
Troll King Tommy
Violence concluded.
🔐 AUTHENTICATION REQUIRED
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