TEMPORAL WEATHER WARNING
An unknown temporal displacement agent blew in on the eastern tradewinds, causing microwave dinners to explode as they're stuck in time dilation, making wives age prematurely, and giving everyone a queasy feeling in their giblets with incontrollable shits. Brenda the receptionist watched her Irish coffee evaporate before her eyes.
🥊 VIOLENCE BREAKDOWN
BLESSED
09-24-25
APPROVED
Krazy K
Strength70
Speed85
Endurance75
Technique98
Molecular Density2.4
Existential Dread45
Fingers11
Toes9
TALE OF THE TAPE
Krazy K VS Lasagna Layer Lord
Lasagna Layer Lord
85Strength
60Speed
95Endurance
88Technique
3.6Molecular Density
55Existential Dread
10Fingers
10Toes
🏆 VIOLENCE VICTOR
Lasagna Layer Lord
Violence concluded.
🔐 AUTHENTICATION REQUIRED
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