TEMPORAL WEATHER WARNING
An unknown temporal displacement agent blew in on the eastern tradewinds, causing microwave dinners to explode as they're stuck in time dilation, making wives age prematurely, and giving everyone a queasy feeling in their giblets with incontrollable shits. Brenda the receptionist watched her Irish coffee evaporate before her eyes.
🥊 VIOLENCE BREAKDOWN
BLESSED
09-30-25
APPROVED
What Even Is This
Strength65
Speed90
Endurance65
Technique90
Molecular Density1.1
Existential Dread95
Fingers9
Toes11
TALE OF THE TAPE
What Even Is This VS The Meaning Seeker
The Meaning Seeker
60Strength
85Speed
75Endurance
92Technique
1.8Molecular Density
98Existential Dread
11Fingers
9Toes
🏆 VIOLENCE VICTOR
The Meaning Seeker
Violence concluded.
🔐 AUTHENTICATION REQUIRED
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