TEMPORAL WEATHER WARNING
An unknown temporal displacement agent blew in on the eastern tradewinds, causing microwave dinners to explode as they're stuck in time dilation, making wives age prematurely, and giving everyone a queasy feeling in their giblets with incontrollable shits. Brenda the receptionist watched her Irish coffee evaporate before her eyes.
🥊 VIOLENCE BREAKDOWN
BLESSED
10-10-25
APPROVED
HOA Sniper Sally
Strength85
Speed70
Endurance70
Technique75
Molecular Density3.4
Existential Dread77
Fingers10
Toes10
TALE OF THE TAPE
HOA Sniper Sally VS Unattended Swing Set
Unattended Swing Set
60Strength
80Speed
70Endurance
90Technique
1.0Molecular Density
76Existential Dread
0Fingers
0Toes
🏆 VIOLENCE VICTOR
Unattended Swing Set
Violence concluded.
🔐 AUTHENTICATION REQUIRED
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