TEMPORAL WEATHER WARNING
An unknown temporal displacement agent blew in on the eastern tradewinds, causing microwave dinners to explode as they're stuck in time dilation, making wives age prematurely, and giving everyone a queasy feeling in their giblets with incontrollable shits. Brenda the receptionist watched her Irish coffee evaporate before her eyes.
🥊 VIOLENCE BREAKDOWN
BLESSED
10-24-25
APPROVED
BO BAX JR FACT
Strength60
Speed100
Endurance60
Technique80
Molecular Density38.9
Existential Dread92
Fingers9
Toes11
TALE OF THE TAPE
BO BAX JR FACT VS Dank Dill
Dank Dill
75Strength
75Speed
75Endurance
75Technique
45.2Molecular Density
95Existential Dread
10Fingers
9Toes
🏆 VIOLENCE VICTOR
Dank Dill
Violence concluded.
🔐 AUTHENTICATION REQUIRED
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