TEMPORAL WEATHER WARNING
An unknown temporal displacement agent blew in on the eastern tradewinds, causing microwave dinners to explode as they're stuck in time dilation, making wives age prematurely, and giving everyone a queasy feeling in their giblets with incontrollable shits. Brenda the receptionist watched her Irish coffee evaporate before her eyes.
🥊 VIOLENCE BREAKDOWN
BLESSED
11-07-25
APPROVED
Teflon Moonbeam
Strength80
Speed85
Endurance81
Technique88
Molecular Density3.7
Existential Dread70
Fingers11
Toes9
TALE OF THE TAPE
Teflon Moonbeam VS Librarian Linda "Shush of Death"
Librarian Linda "Shush of Death"
70Strength
80Speed
90Endurance
92Technique
2.1Molecular Density
60Existential Dread
10Fingers
10Toes
🏆 VIOLENCE VICTOR
Librarian Linda "Shush of Death"
Violence concluded.
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