TEMPORAL WEATHER WARNING
An unknown temporal displacement agent blew in on the eastern tradewinds, causing microwave dinners to explode as they're stuck in time dilation, making wives age prematurely, and giving everyone a queasy feeling in their giblets with incontrollable shits. Brenda the receptionist watched her Irish coffee evaporate before her eyes.
🥊 VIOLENCE BREAKDOWN
BLESSED
11-10-25
APPROVED
Elevator Music
Strength43
Speed67
Endurance96
Technique94
Molecular Density1.2
Existential Dread112
Fingers10
Toes10
TALE OF THE TAPE
Elevator Music VS Autocorrect
Autocorrect
84Strength
77Speed
56Endurance
83Technique
1.2Molecular Density
95Existential Dread
11Fingers
9Toes
🏆 VIOLENCE VICTOR
Elevator Music
Violence concluded.
🔐 AUTHENTICATION REQUIRED
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