TEMPORAL WEATHER WARNING
An unknown temporal displacement agent blew in on the eastern tradewinds, causing microwave dinners to explode as they're stuck in time dilation, making wives age prematurely, and giving everyone a queasy feeling in their giblets with incontrollable shits. Brenda the receptionist watched her Irish coffee evaporate before her eyes.
🥊 VIOLENCE BREAKDOWN
BLESSED
11-11-25
APPROVED
Deductible Dave "The Crusher"
Strength71
Speed85
Endurance70
Technique74
Molecular Density3.2
Existential Dread63
Fingers10
Toes10
TALE OF THE TAPE
Deductible Dave "The Crusher" VS Nesticle
Nesticle
70Strength
83Speed
78Endurance
69Technique
48.5Molecular Density
91Existential Dread
7Fingers
11Toes
🏆 VIOLENCE VICTOR
Nesticle
Violence concluded.
🔐 AUTHENTICATION REQUIRED
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