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🥊 SPOODBLORT

⛈️ CRITICAL WEATHER ADVISORY
TEMPORAL WEATHER WARNING

An unknown temporal displacement agent blew in on the eastern tradewinds, causing microwave dinners to explode as they're stuck in time dilation, making wives age prematurely, and giving everyone a queasy feeling in their giblets with incontrollable shits. Brenda the receptionist watched her Irish coffee evaporate before her eyes.

🥊 VIOLENCE BREAKDOWN

BLESSED
11-12-25
APPROVED
📅 Scheduled Violence Wednesday, November 12, 2025 at 6:00 PM
⚡ Combat Status ✅ VIOLENCE COMPLETE
Borrowed Time

Borrowed Time

Strength72
Speed78
Endurance69
Technique81
Molecular Density1.4
Existential Dread44
Fingers10
Toes10
TALE OF THE TAPE
Borrowed Time VS Captain Hindsight
Captain Hindsight

Captain Hindsight

58Strength
92Speed
71Endurance
79Technique
1.1Molecular Density
84Existential Dread
10Fingers
10Toes

🏆 VIOLENCE VICTOR

Captain Hindsight
Violence concluded.
← Return to Violence Schedule