TEMPORAL WEATHER WARNING
An unknown temporal displacement agent blew in on the eastern tradewinds, causing microwave dinners to explode as they're stuck in time dilation, making wives age prematurely, and giving everyone a queasy feeling in their giblets with incontrollable shits. Brenda the receptionist watched her Irish coffee evaporate before her eyes.
🥊 VIOLENCE BREAKDOWN
BLESSED
11-13-25
APPROVED
Hair in the Drain Helena
Strength81
Speed64
Endurance71
Technique74
Molecular Density2.4
Existential Dread40
Fingers10
Toes10
TALE OF THE TAPE
Hair in the Drain Helena VS Soap Scum Supreme
Soap Scum Supreme
70Strength
82Speed
71Endurance
77Technique
2.6Molecular Density
25Existential Dread
10Fingers
10Toes
🏆 VIOLENCE VICTOR
Hair in the Drain Helena
Violence concluded.
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