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🥊 SPOODBLORT

⛈️ CRITICAL WEATHER ADVISORY
TEMPORAL WEATHER WARNING

An unknown temporal displacement agent blew in on the eastern tradewinds, causing microwave dinners to explode as they're stuck in time dilation, making wives age prematurely, and giving everyone a queasy feeling in their giblets with incontrollable shits. Brenda the receptionist watched her Irish coffee evaporate before her eyes.

🥊 VIOLENCE BREAKDOWN

BLESSED
11-14-25
APPROVED
📅 Scheduled Violence Friday, November 14, 2025 at 6:30 PM
⚡ Combat Status ✅ VIOLENCE COMPLETE
Hot Sauce Harold “The Burninator”

Hot Sauce Harold “The Burninator”

Strength96
Speed75
Endurance70
Technique60
Molecular Density4.8
Existential Dread5
Fingers10
Toes10
TALE OF THE TAPE
Hot Sauce Harold “The Burninator” VS wilson
wilson

wilson

93Strength
78Speed
81Endurance
48Technique
10.8Molecular Density
54Existential Dread
12Fingers
14Toes

🏆 VIOLENCE VICTOR

Hot Sauce Harold “The Burninator”
Violence concluded.
← Return to Violence Schedule