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🥊 SPOODBLORT

⛈️ CRITICAL WEATHER ADVISORY
TEMPORAL WEATHER WARNING

An unknown temporal displacement agent blew in on the eastern tradewinds, causing microwave dinners to explode as they're stuck in time dilation, making wives age prematurely, and giving everyone a queasy feeling in their giblets with incontrollable shits. Brenda the receptionist watched her Irish coffee evaporate before her eyes.

🥊 VIOLENCE BREAKDOWN

BLESSED
12-11-25
APPROVED
📅 Scheduled Violence Thursday, December 11, 2025 at 9:30 PM
⚡ Combat Status ✅ VIOLENCE COMPLETE
Glizzy Goblin

Glizzy Goblin

Strength75
Speed71
Endurance95
Technique80
Molecular Density1.5
Existential Dread78
Fingers6
Toes14
TALE OF THE TAPE
Glizzy Goblin VS Diplomatic Immunity
Diplomatic Immunity

Diplomatic Immunity

113Strength
91Speed
64Endurance
76Technique
39.8Molecular Density
38Existential Dread
33Fingers
21Toes

🏆 VIOLENCE VICTOR

Diplomatic Immunity
Violence concluded.
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