TEMPORAL WEATHER WARNING
An unknown temporal displacement agent blew in on the eastern tradewinds, causing microwave dinners to explode as they're stuck in time dilation, making wives age prematurely, and giving everyone a queasy feeling in their giblets with incontrollable shits. Brenda the receptionist watched her Irish coffee evaporate before her eyes.
🥊 VIOLENCE BREAKDOWN
BLESSED
12-13-25
APPROVED
Low Battery Mode
Strength103
Speed6
Endurance101
Technique102
Molecular Density10.0
Existential Dread99
Fingers20
Toes20
TALE OF THE TAPE
Low Battery Mode VS Bacon Windfall
Bacon Windfall
86Strength
69Speed
78Endurance
75Technique
2.8Molecular Density
18Existential Dread
10Fingers
10Toes
🏆 VIOLENCE VICTOR
Low Battery Mode
Violence concluded.
🔐 AUTHENTICATION REQUIRED
Authenticate via Discord to access violence wagering systems