Help
Discord YouTube

🥊 SPOODBLORT

⛈️ CRITICAL WEATHER ADVISORY
TEMPORAL WEATHER WARNING

An unknown temporal displacement agent blew in on the eastern tradewinds, causing microwave dinners to explode as they're stuck in time dilation, making wives age prematurely, and giving everyone a queasy feeling in their giblets with incontrollable shits. Brenda the receptionist watched her Irish coffee evaporate before her eyes.

🥊 VIOLENCE BREAKDOWN

BLESSED
01-06-26
APPROVED
📅 Scheduled Violence Tuesday, January 6, 2026 at 2:30 PM
⚡ Combat Status ✅ VIOLENCE COMPLETE
Tucan Shakur

Tucan Shakur

Strength120
Speed100
Endurance20
Technique60
Molecular Density75.8
Existential Dread99
Fingers14
Toes13
TALE OF THE TAPE
Tucan Shakur VS Fist Sundaze
Fist Sundaze

Fist Sundaze

65Strength
20Speed
120Endurance
95Technique
44.7Molecular Density
94Existential Dread
10Fingers
9Toes

🏆 VIOLENCE VICTOR

Tucan Shakur
Violence concluded.
← Return to Violence Schedule