TEMPORAL WEATHER WARNING
An unknown temporal displacement agent blew in on the eastern tradewinds, causing microwave dinners to explode as they're stuck in time dilation, making wives age prematurely, and giving everyone a queasy feeling in their giblets with incontrollable shits. Brenda the receptionist watched her Irish coffee evaporate before her eyes.
🥊 VIOLENCE BREAKDOWN
BLESSED
01-14-26
APPROVED
Deductible Dave "The Crusher"
Strength71
Speed85
Endurance70
Technique74
Molecular Density3.2
Existential Dread63
Fingers10
Toes10
TALE OF THE TAPE
Deductible Dave "The Crusher" VS Slobby Joe Jr.
Slobby Joe Jr.
96Strength
75Speed
60Endurance
69Technique
30.0Molecular Density
98Existential Dread
12Fingers
6Toes
🏆 VIOLENCE VICTOR
Deductible Dave "The Crusher"
Violence concluded.
🔐 AUTHENTICATION REQUIRED
Authenticate via Discord to access violence wagering systems