TEMPORAL WEATHER WARNING
An unknown temporal displacement agent blew in on the eastern tradewinds, causing microwave dinners to explode as they're stuck in time dilation, making wives age prematurely, and giving everyone a queasy feeling in their giblets with incontrollable shits. Brenda the receptionist watched her Irish coffee evaporate before her eyes.
🥊 VIOLENCE BREAKDOWN
BLESSED
10-02-25
APPROVED
Leftover Larry
Strength60
Speed70
Endurance90
Technique80
Molecular Density2.7
Existential Dread55
Fingers9
Toes11
TALE OF THE TAPE
Leftover Larry VS Jerkoff Sysadmin Manager
Jerkoff Sysadmin Manager
28Strength
115Speed
114Endurance
23Technique
21.4Molecular Density
99Existential Dread
7Fingers
10Toes
🏆 VIOLENCE VICTOR
Leftover Larry
Violence concluded.
🔐 AUTHENTICATION REQUIRED
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