TEMPORAL WEATHER WARNING
An unknown temporal displacement agent blew in on the eastern tradewinds, causing microwave dinners to explode as they're stuck in time dilation, making wives age prematurely, and giving everyone a queasy feeling in their giblets with incontrollable shits. Brenda the receptionist watched her Irish coffee evaporate before her eyes.
🥊 VIOLENCE BREAKDOWN
BLESSED
10-11-25
APPROVED
Donny "Dirty Mouth" McBubble
Strength88
Speed72
Endurance83
Technique90
Molecular Density2.9
Existential Dread25
Fingers10
Toes10
TALE OF THE TAPE
Donny "Dirty Mouth" McBubble VS Spreadsheet Specter
Spreadsheet Specter
51Strength
62Speed
85Endurance
112Technique
1.1Molecular Density
60Existential Dread
10Fingers
10Toes
🏆 VIOLENCE VICTOR
Donny "Dirty Mouth" McBubble
Violence concluded.
🔐 AUTHENTICATION REQUIRED
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