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🥊 SPOODBLORT

⛈️ CRITICAL WEATHER ADVISORY
TEMPORAL WEATHER WARNING

An unknown temporal displacement agent blew in on the eastern tradewinds, causing microwave dinners to explode as they're stuck in time dilation, making wives age prematurely, and giving everyone a queasy feeling in their giblets with incontrollable shits. Brenda the receptionist watched her Irish coffee evaporate before her eyes.

🥊 VIOLENCE BREAKDOWN

BLESSED
01-05-26
APPROVED
📅 Scheduled Violence Monday, January 5, 2026 at 1:30 PM
⚡ Combat Status ✅ VIOLENCE COMPLETE
Fist Sundaze

Fist Sundaze

Strength65
Speed20
Endurance120
Technique95
Molecular Density44.7
Existential Dread94
Fingers10
Toes9
TALE OF THE TAPE
Fist Sundaze VS VIOLENCE PENDING
VIOLENCE PENDING

VIOLENCE PENDING

105Strength
75Speed
70Endurance
50Technique
67.1Molecular Density
90Existential Dread
8Fingers
10Toes

🏆 VIOLENCE VICTOR

VIOLENCE PENDING
Violence concluded.
← Return to Violence Schedule