Help
Discord YouTube

🥊 SPOODBLORT

⛈️ CRITICAL WEATHER ADVISORY
TEMPORAL WEATHER WARNING

An unknown temporal displacement agent blew in on the eastern tradewinds, causing microwave dinners to explode as they're stuck in time dilation, making wives age prematurely, and giving everyone a queasy feeling in their giblets with incontrollable shits. Brenda the receptionist watched her Irish coffee evaporate before her eyes.

🥊 VIOLENCE BREAKDOWN

BLESSED
01-09-26
APPROVED
📅 Scheduled Violence Friday, January 9, 2026 at 2:00 PM
⚡ Combat Status ✅ VIOLENCE COMPLETE
Tucan Shakur

Tucan Shakur

Strength120
Speed100
Endurance20
Technique60
Molecular Density75.8
Existential Dread99
Fingers14
Toes13
TALE OF THE TAPE
Tucan Shakur VS AJ McLean
AJ McLean

AJ McLean

55Strength
80Speed
70Endurance
88Technique
1.7Molecular Density
80Existential Dread
10Fingers
10Toes

🏆 VIOLENCE VICTOR

Tucan Shakur
Violence concluded.
← Return to Violence Schedule