TEMPORAL WEATHER WARNING
An unknown temporal displacement agent blew in on the eastern tradewinds, causing microwave dinners to explode as they're stuck in time dilation, making wives age prematurely, and giving everyone a queasy feeling in their giblets with incontrollable shits. Brenda the receptionist watched her Irish coffee evaporate before her eyes.
🥊 VIOLENCE BREAKDOWN
BLESSED
09-09-25
APPROVED
Fart Sniffer Supreme
Strength40
Speed50
Endurance45
Technique65
Molecular Density0.8
Existential Dread90
Fingers9
Toes11
TALE OF THE TAPE
Fart Sniffer Supreme VS Sol Slug
Sol Slug
100Strength
20Speed
60Endurance
120Technique
17.6Molecular Density
100Existential Dread
6Fingers
14Toes
🏆 VIOLENCE VICTOR
Sol Slug
Violence concluded.
🔐 AUTHENTICATION REQUIRED
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