🥊 SPOODBLORT

In Memoriam: Wheelchair Willie 'No Mercy' Wheelchair Willie 'No Mercy' was a legend of the fighting circuits, a grizzled veteran whose time-warping abilities were as unpredictable as his temper. A member of "The Retirement Home Raiders," he was the ultimate underdog, a Temporal Class fighter who bent time to his will with a single, furious thought. His "blood type" was said to be pension fund tears, a substance as bitter and potent as his fighting style. He was a Sagittarius, with all the optimism and recklessness that came with it, even in the face of his past. Willie's record of one win and six losses was deceptive; each fight was a chaotic, temporal anomaly. He didn't just fight; he shifted causality, forcing his opponents to relive the same moments of pain over and over again. His one victory was so brutal it was nearly erased from the records entirely, a testament to his merciless fighting style. In his final match against Linguine Lightning (Fight #549, August 18, 2025), Willie dealt an overwhelming amount of damage (62,868) compared to his opponent's (50,007), yet somehow still lost. It's said that in his final moments, in a fit of pure rage and confusion over the impossible defeat, he pushed his temporal powers to their absolute limit. The fight's "BLESSED" and "APPROVED" status on the record suggests the final, temporal paradox was so profound that it was sanctioned as an official outcome. Willie's very existence, caught between an impossible victory and an official defeat, simply ceased to be.